*Why do old men have hair in their ears?
*Why does caregiver and caretaker mean the same thing?
*What does OK actually mean?
*Why do we feel blue? and what color does a smurf feel when they are down?
*Why do donuts have holes?
*Why do the numbers on a phone go one way and the numbers on the calculator go *the other?
*Why is it you can walk down a road, even if it goes uphill?
*Why do we say "bye bye" but not "hi hi"?
*Can blind people be dyslexic when they read Braille?
*How do you handcuff a one-armed man?
*Why is the abbreviation for pound lb. when l or b isn't in the word pound?
*Why is it we have the weight of the world on our shoulders but have to get it off our chests?
*Why do they call it a RUNNING BACK when he is running foward?
*If you tell someone they are being judgmental arnt you being judgmental yourself?
*Why do they call it your "bottom", when it's really in the middle of your body?
*Why do British people never sound British when they sing?
*Why do they call it "head over heels in love" If our head is always over our heels?
*Can a hearse driver drive a corpse in the Car Pool lane?
*How do they get those boats in those glass bottles?
*Why is it called a TV set when theres only one?
*How did the headless horseman know where he was going?
*Why do they call it an escalator if it takes you down?
*Why is it called football when you hardly use your feet?
*Do cows drink milk?
*If a person owns a piece of land do they own it all the
way down to the core of the earth?
*What is a male ladybug called?
*Why is an alarm clock going "off" when it actually
turns on?
*If you mated a bull dog and a shitsu, would it be called a bullshit?
*Does the President have to pay taxes?
*Why do they put "for indoor or outdoor use only" on christmas lights?
*If an ambulance is on its way to save someone, and it runs someone over, does it stop to help
them?
*Why is Grape Nuts cereal called that, when it contains neither grapes, nor nuts?
*If Jimmy crackes corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
*Why do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front?
*What ever happened to an E grade? We have A,B,C,D,F but no E.
*Do they have the word "dictionary" in the dictionary?
*What do you call a female daddy long legs?
*Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
*In France do people just ask for toast and get French toast? or do they have to ask for American toast?
*Why is it called a "drive through" if you have to stop?
*Why are SOFTballs hard?
*Do vampires get AIDS?
*Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp which no decent human being would eat?
*Why are they called goose bumps? Do geese get people bumps?
*Why is it that lemon dishsoap is made with real lemons, but lemon juice is artificial flavoring?
*If you stole a pen from a bank then would it still be considered a bank robbery?
*Is French kissing in France just called kissing?
*Why is the third hand on the watch called second hand?
*Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic
called rush hour?
*Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink what ever comes out"?
*What do people in China call their good plates?
*Can you sentence a homeless man to house arrest
*If the professor on Giligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
*Why dosent a chicken egg taste like chicken?
*Why is it that cargo is transported by ship while a shipment is transported by car?
*Does peanut butter really have butter in it?
*Do mimes watch silent movies?
*Why do people say "You scared the living daylights out of me" when daylight is not living?
*Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but people don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
*Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up "there" anyway?
*If somebody vanished without a trace, how do people know they are missing?
*Why are boxing rings square?
*Why is it called pineapple, when's there neither pine nor apple in it?
*Why is it called eggplant, when there's no egg in it?
*Why do people never say "it's only a game" when they're winning?
*What was the best thing before sliced bread?
*Why do birds have white poop?
*Can good looking Eskimo girls be called hot?
*Why is an electrical outlet called an outlet when you plug things into it? Shouldn't it be called an inlet.
*If love is blind, how can we believe in love at first
sight?
*If you accidently ate your own tongue, what would it taste like?
*Do sore thumbs really stick out?
*Why is it when your almost dead your on deaths doorstep, but when your actually dead your not in deaths house?
*Why do we scrub Down and wash Up?
*What's the opposite of opposite?
*If Practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, then why practice?
*Why are toe nail clippers bigger than finger nail clippers when your toe nails are smaller than your finger nails?
*Is the opposite of "out of whack" "in whack"?
*If you try to fail and suceed, what did you just do?
*Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
*Why is the blackboard green?
*Why do they call it a black light when it's really purple?
*Why do hotdogs come in packs of 8 when hotdog rolls come in packs of 10?
*How come the sun makes your skin darker but your hair lighter?
*If you dig a tunnel straight through the earth, will you come out with your feet first?
*Why are pennies bigger than dimes?
*Did they have antiques in the olden days?
*Are zebras black with white stripes, or white with black stripes?
*If Pringles are "so good that once you pop, you can't stop" why do they come with a resealable lid?
*What came first, the fruit or the color orange?
*Can blind people see their dreams?
*If there's an exception to every rule, is there
an exception to that rule?
*Why do you click on start to exit Microsoft Windows?
*Have you ever wondered why Trix are only for kids?
*Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
*Why do most cars have speedometers that go up to at least 130 when you legally can't go that fast on any road?
*Why do they call it "getting your dog fixed" if
afterwards it doesn't work anymore?
*If Wile Coyote had enough money for all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
*If masochists like to torture themselves, wouldn't they do it best by not torturing themselves?
*why is it called lipstick when it always comes off?
*If when people freak out they are said to be "having a cow", when cows freak out are they said to be "having a person?"
*Aren't you tired of people asking you rhetorical questions and you don't know if they are rhetorical questions or not?
*Why is a person that handles your money called a BROKER?
*Why do we leave expensive cars in the drivway, when we keep worthless junk in the garage?
*why do they have handicap parking spaces in front of they skating rings?
*What happens if someone loses a lost and found box?
*Why do they call it taking a dump? Shouldn't it be leaving a dump?
*What if the hokey-pokey really is what it's all about?
*Where in the nursery rhyme does it say humpty dumpty is an egg?
*Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
*Why do banks leave the door wide open but the pens chained to the counter?
*What's the difference between a wise man and a wise guy?
*If Americans throw rice at weddings, do the Chinese throw hamburgers?
*Why are both male and female ladybugs called ladybugs instead of ladybugs and manbugs?
*How can you hear yourself think?
*If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
*Is a man full of wonder a wonderful man?
*Is a hot car cool or is a cool car hot?
*How come thaw and unthaw mean the same thing
*If a Man is talking in the forest and there is no woman there to hear him, is he still wrong?
*Why is it that when a person tells you there's over a million stars in the universe you believe them, but if someone tells you there's wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?
*why do you get on a bus and a train but get into a car?
*Why is it good to be a Daddy's girl, but bad to be a Momma's boy?
*Why do grocery stores buy so many checkout line registers if they only keep 3 or 4 open?
*How does santa get into a house that doesn't have a chimney?
*If you're in hell, and are mad at someone, where do you tell them to go?
*What would Geronimo say if he jumped out of an airplane?
*If Barbie is so popular, then why do you have to buy her friends?
*Why does Donald Duck wear a towel when he comes out of the shower, when he doesn't usually wear any pants?
*If you take an oriental person and spin him around a few times, does he become disoriented?
*Why do they call it an asteroid when its outside the hemisphere but call it a hemorrhoid when its in your ass?
*If a cow laughed real hard, would milk come out her nose?
*Could someone ever get addicted to counseling?
*If so, how could you treat them?
*Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you?
*But when you take him in a car, he sticks his head out the window!
*Do fish get cramps after eating?
*Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy
adultery?
*Do one legged ducks swim in circles?
*Can someone give up lent for lent?
*Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
*Why do they have 7 oceans when they are all
connected?
*Why is it when we duck they call us chicken?
*Why is there a size 12-14, 14-16, 16-18, and so
forth, but no 13, 15, and 17?
*If lava melts rock, wouldnt the lava melt the volcano?
*If a man has no fingers, can he press charges?
*Why do people say, "you've been working like a dog" when dogs just sit around all day?
*How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
*Can you blow a balloon up under water?
*Can crop circles be square?
*How do they get the air inside the bubble wrap?
*If we had a president that was a woman, would her
husband be the first man?
*Why do police officers wear tight clothes and dressy shoes? wouldn't that make them slower when chasing someone?
*If London Bridge is standing why is there a song about it falling down?
*Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
*Why do birds bob their heads when they walk?
*Why is it when we ask for the check in a restaurant they bring us a bill?
*How come wine and hard liquor doesn't come in cans, but beer does?
*When lightning strikes the ocean why don't all the fish die?
*If people say if you eat dessert before dinner it will ruin your appetite wont eating dinner before dessert ruin your appetite for dessert?
*If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a
hearing?
*If someone crashes his or her car on purpose, why is it still a car accident?
*If people with one arm go to get their nails done, do they pay half price?
*If Sunday is the holy day of rest why do we have to get up early for church?
*When you snap your fingers, does the sound occur when your middle finger releases from your thumb, or when your middle finger hits the palm of your hand?
*Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars
to look at things on the ground?
*What is the parking situation like at the Special Olympics?
*How come, in the Mini Wheats commercials, Sweets has a Brooklyn accent and *Wheats has an English accent? They're attached at the back, wouldn't they have been raised in the same place?
*Can you fart and burp at the same time?
*If two identical twin brothers married identical twin
sisters, would there kids be identical?
*Since the U.S. says United We Stand, does that offend legless people?
*If a 911 operator has a heart attack, whom does he/she call?
*How come when you go in the front door of a church, you are at the back of the church, and if you go in the back door, you would end up in the front of the church?
*If your named Will and you are in the army do you get worried when people say fire at will?
*Why is Bra singular and Panties plural?
*What are those little things on the end of your shoelaces called
*Why can't we sneeze with our eyes open?
*If there were a knowledge contest, would the female winner be called Miss Informed?
*If dinosaurs had sores.........what would they be called?
*What does the T in T-Shirt really mean?
*Why does the label on childrens Tylenol tell you not to operate heavy machinery or vehicles when it's for CHILDREN!?
*Why do they call front seat shotgun?
*Do bald men wash their head with soap or shampoo?
*Why is there not a Channel 1 on TV?
*Why are the obituaries found in the "living" section of the newspaper?
*How can someone be dirt poor, and another be filthy rich?
*When you put 'THE' and 'IRS' together, it forms 'THEIRS'. Coincidence? I think not?
*Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
*If anything's possible, then is it possible that nothing's possible?
why are rubber duckies yellow when most real ducks aren't?
*Are there female leprechauns?
*Do fish sleep?
*Isn't it scary that the word "therapist" is the same as the words "the" and "rapist" put together
*Do pigs pull ham strings?
*Why do people say heads up when you should duck?
*Why does blow and suck mean the same thing when
we describe something being crap?
*Do birds pee?
*Do siamese twins pay for one ticket or two tickets when they go to movies and concerts?
*What do you say when someone says you're in denial, but you're not?
*If you had x-ray vision, but closed your eyes, could you still see?
